Gratitude Is Key To Being Happy.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Practice gratitude everyday and even tho' its impossible to have 100% of joy and happiness all of the time, due to life's negative absurdities. It always comes down to choice in how we allow these things to effect us. I am not saying we should have the attitude of not giving a dam about things, because thats negative in itself. Its more than that. Everything is a lesson, meant to teach us more about ourselves and to help us develop our higher thinking and... spirituality. So if we choose to be emotionally burdened by the sadness and bs in the world, its not that it occurs that makes you feel bad, its how you allow it to effect you and for how long, that dictates your feelings and attitudes. Sure there are many sad and heartbreaking things that occur for which we can do nothing for to help it. We can feel true empathy for the unfortunate. Take from those things the lesson, embrace it and carry on with calm, confidence and better direction for yourself. As an old saying went: " I use to complain about my shoes until I saw a man who had no feet." Be grateful for all things in your life. Strive to be happy. Happy life day everyone!

 

 

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Copyright(c)2016.GratitudeIsKeyToBeingHappy.Written by Sherrie Vitello. All Rights Reserved.

Keep To Your Vision.

 "Human Beings, by changing their inner attitudes of their minds can change the outer aspects of their lives." - William James

Some call it visioning, others call it dreaming, reframing, visualization, positive thinking or cognitive therapy.
And still others just do it and don't call it anything. Its the art of deliberately picturing something that we desire - behavior, goal or outcome-
so that its more likely to come about. Thinking alone isn't going to make something happen, of course.
But once we have a vision, we can begin to act in ways that will make the vision become real.

Ask yourself: "I have a picture of how I want my life to go. What do I need to do to make it happen?"

 (Excerpt taken from: The Daily Book of Positive Quotations, by Linda Picone)

 

Way Beyond The Time For Change

What if you woke up one morning and realized
you're the dissappointment?

So it's 6:30am and time to wake up. For the longest time you can remember feeling like crap as soon as you became conscious. You would almost come to tears because you knew it was time to get up and face the day. (Same s**t, different day) was how you felt. Until of course you got your fix for the day. Once you started using you loved waking up, because you knew you would be able to get your morning fix and feel right again. Knowing it sounds ridiculous, even sad, that you looked forward to using just so you'd feel right. But sad to say, that's what happens when a person is an addict. Everything seems better when we've had our DOC (drug of choice.)Until things start to fall apart, you get into trouble, or you just ignore your addictive lifestyle. It will keep snow balling out of control, until you realize how altering your thoughts of addiction causes change.

In the beginning of using, we believe its new, satisfying, even exciting to know you're about to get your fix. But after awhile its just an addiction, ball and chain, monkey on your back. It becomes a problem in one way or another. Things start going wrong for you, family and some friends stop coming around you, good relationships fall away, you get into trouble. You know in your heart that you're not living the way you were meant to. What if you woke up one morning and realized you're the dissappointment? The addict thinks how good it would feel to feel right without having to use. Its alarming to know how many are functioning addicts. They go to work and confront the day with confidence. Nothing bothers them, so long as they have their stash so they could bump themselves up (when needed) throughout the day. And no one knew of their ball and chain of addiction. As their addiction progresses, they wanted it even more, to feel this way clean. Although they love the way their drug of choice made them feel, they knew in their hearts this could not last. The addict comes to a fork in the road of their lives. They wonder why things don't go better for them.They will either get help and stop using and change their lives for the better or they will continue down their road of self destruction and give up on themselves. That is such a shame and a waste because life itself, is a gift.

Example photo:
Left pic is how Ann looked at
her worst time as a addict.
Right pic is how she
looks now clean
and happy.

In this example this addict decided to stop killing themselves and changed for the better. So how do they feel now? Now that they are no longer using? Since it's been about a year now they actually do feel good when they wake up. It took looking inside of oneself and some attitude adjustments to change the negative feelings into positive ones. Alot of meetings and positive readings. But when you want something so bad it hurts, you'd be surprised how strong you can become. For most, what they've learned was that they have to change how they feel about their lives, about themselves. It can take some time, but it can be accomplished. When the addict gets sick of being sick, realization of knowing you need to change is the first step to recovery.

Humans can achieve alot more than they think they can once they get passed the fear of being without the addiction and giving themselves a chance to achieve a better way of living. If we think of the possibilities instead of the obstacles, focus on the things we want, NOT the things we don't want, attract the positive, we can do wonders with ourselves and our lives. But you have to be willing to look at yourself, see what you've become, know you ARE more than your addiction or a quick fix. For the amount of people in the U.S. alone, all of the experience people have gained going through recovery and overcoming their addictions, still those who are stuck in their addictions will rarely heed the advice of those who've been through it and have come out on the otherside, free of their addiction. When the fear of getting high becomes greater than the fear of being clean, you'll know it's way beyond the time for change.

Enjoy the day.

Written by Sherrie Vitello/inserts by Celeste Vitello(c)2011.Way Beyond The Time For Change.All Rights Reserved.

Beating Your Addiction - How Do You Make Changes for the Better?

These steps really work. If you've been to NA or AA meetings then you know the do's & don'ts that are meant to help you stay clean & sober. Sure it takes commitment & hard work BUT you can be successful at depleting your addiction & staying clean. Plus the benefits of participating in these activities goes above & beyond just staying clean & sober. The health benefits both mentally & physically are phenomenal. Putting this into your daily lifestyle will make it become habit. A good habit too. As you progress with your routines if you start to feel like you're getting bored with the samething day after day...well, change it up alittle. But don't give up on it. Never give up on yourself. You are totally worth the effort. You deserve to live a happy life. You only get one, so make it count. Let go of the past mess ups, absurdities, addictions & guilt. Start a new life for yourself & loved ones Now! You'll find that as you go along with your changes, it does get easier to overcome the triggers & cravings. At times you may feel as though you're getting no where, but know this, with every effort you put into changing your lifestyle the stronger you get & more results you'll see as you go.  Learning to love yourself can seem difficult but given a chance you will learn to live & let go. And you'll be so much happier, you'll be able to deal with situations as they come along. Whether good or bad. You will have faith in yourself even more so. Its a matter of YOU taking the steps to MAKE the changes. It's your choice, you can't place blame on anyone or anything else. If you truly want to live a addiction free life...then make the choice to do so.

The Rainbow Tree - An edited version that improves our quality of life.

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.

You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back. Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

Learn to let go of people that cause you pain. Hold fast to those people in our lives that lift us up and help us feel happy. Let go of all the things that you can do nothing about. Mistakes made in the past are there to help us to learn not to do them again and to help someone else who we see is going down that same path. Lift others up that seem to be down, sometimes a word of encouragement can make all the difference. Never be too quick to judge someone you don't know.

For as much negative things that are always around us in our daily lives there is a vast amount of positives. Always think of the possibilities instead of the obstacles that can trip us up. Take on the day as if it was your last. Take nothing or no one for granted. Be grateful for your health, loves, beauty in the world, things that make you happy and rainbows.

...everyone dies, but not everyone truly lives. It is a path we all must take. Enjoy the day.


Written by Author Unknown with excerpts added in by Sherrie Vitello

Our viewers liked more interesting reading here: http://myselfselfhelp.blogspot.com


Copyright(c)2011.The Rainbow Tree, written by Author Unknown and edited by Sherrie Vitello. All Rights Reserved.

Living An Unhappy Life - The Causes and Effects.

Someone once said - "There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living." (Author Unkown)

A dear friend sent me this parable the other day and its been on my mind ever since. I keep seeing how it relates so well to those that are struggling with their happiness. What are the causes of them living an  unhappy life?  No matter what we say to those we care about, who are at a bad time in their life, its so hard sometimes to make one see a better way. Its actually heart wrenching to know that someone we love and care about is living a life of self destruction. So much so that they can't even see their own way out of it. What can we do for them? We can offer them support and guidance, hoping that it may help them, but unless these people change from within nothing we do will really help. Whatever our loved one may be suffering from that makes their lives miserable, the actual cause of it we can despise, but we shouldn't despise that person who is suffering from it. It could be happening to anyone of us. 

Even when we've tried so hard to help someone we care about that is struggling in their lives we eventually get that sinking feeling inside that we can't do anything more for them. We can find ourselves feeling at a loss, what do we do now? No one has the right answer here because we can't control people, not really. Unless they want to be controlled and those folks usually end up living in some controlling type situation somewhere. One thing is certain, we don't stop loving someone close to us that is living a life that is out of control. We offer comfort and support in anyway we can. We talk with them with love and concern. We keep telling them that things can be better for them. We show them the path to take and hope they'll take it. Most of all, for our own sanity and our own happiness, we can't blame ourselves for the way someone we love and care about has chosen to live.

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Parents can nurture, teach and love their children. Show them the right path to take. But it will be up to that child, once grown, they become responsible for their character and the way they live. That doesn't mean we should just not care about what happens to those we care about that have problems in their lives. Of course we care, we love this person. When we care deeply about someone who is having problems in their lives, it gives us an opportunity to help that person rebuild how they see things in their lives. Even words of encouragement can shine a light at the end of the tunnel for this person. Letting them know that there is a better way to live. There is hope.

Which brings me to how I interpret the parable above. Its important to understand that sometimes in our lives we need to turn and walk away from the lives we may be living. That which is causing us to be miserable. Some of the people in our lives that are dragging us down, influencing negative outcomes or surpressing our healthy attitudes are what I call, toxic people. We may even like these people, but they are contributing to how our lives are panning out and why our lives seem like they are going no where. Our circumstance of how we are living is also a factor as to why our lives seem hopeless, like its going no where fast. Same s**t different day kind of attitude towards living. This will also make us feel like our lives are just useless. But it isn't. Sometimes we just can't see clear or beyond it. It can be like we're falling into a black hole and see no way out. But there is. How?

By change. Change from focusing on the bad things in our lives and focus on the "what if" scenario. The possibilities instead of the obstacles. By that I mean, start thinking about 'what if' I try to feel better about myself, 'what if' I change my job for something more appealing to me, 'what if' I stop drugging or drinking, 'what if' I begin to want to be alive, 'what if' I leave this lifestyle that I've grown accustom to and change it, obviously its not making me happy. 'What if' I start trying to improve myself. As you begin to focus on the "what if" scenario you'll come to a point where you'll ask yourself, "well do I really want to change?" This is where you will face your demons. Now you have to choose, you are at a crossroads. If I were you, I would start to focus on the things you want out of life not the things you don't want. You are responsible for your life. Make it count. Getting involved with people that help to build you up not tear you down. People that are focused on building a better life can be a wonderful influence.  

 Most importantly, learn to forgive. Forgiveness will put out the flame of guilt, anger and animosity. You can start with forgiving yourself. Sometimes we carry within ourselves, things that we're not proud we did, or things that we've done that hurt others. This can weigh heavily on our hearts. You can make ammends with some but you have to let it go and forgive yourself. Then forgive those who have done you wrong. This can be most uplifting for us. Emotionally and spiritually. Its like purging your system of something that was making you ill. This can be, in no doubt the point of never returning to your old ways of thinking and living. Because once you've forgiven these things, you have opened the door to caring for and loving yourself. It's alright..you can love yourself now.  

Everyone eventually learns that life is way too short. I'm still trying to get my brain around how fast it continues to be. And the older we get, the faster it goes. So what do we do when we know we only get so much time to do things? We do as much as we can that will be of benefit for our lives, right? So doesn't it make sense to use what time we have to be as happy and productive as each of us can be? Of course. So we must strive to be happy inspite of all the bs in the world and in our lives. We'll be a better person for it too. But mostly we'll be a happy person and we'll be able to share that happiness with others. I don't know about you all, but I love making others happy because it does make me happy. So sharing the wisdom from life experience, positive advice or words of encouragement, for me, makes me happy to know it just may help someone out there.

And lastly, do you remember when you were younger, and you played games? You would get all excited inside about that one move you were going to make that you knew would allow you to win the game? That was a great feeling. But then sometimes you couldn't win or you moved to the wrong spot and lost. Then you felt kind of bad. But you didn't give up. Because you knew you would have another turn to try again or you knew you would play that game again. And you'd say .."awww, I lost, but I'll win next time!" Well the same principle still applies when we've grown up. We try things out in our lives and some times we don't make it. We may grieve some when we've failed. But remember success is not final and failure is not fatal, its having the courage to carry on that matters. So you try again, something else, it just might be the right thing for you. Think of all you can learn by looking at life this way. Think of all the things you can teach others. Learn to get excited about your life. Life is full of twists and turns. Living it in the haze of an addiction or just giving up on life is cheating yourself out of truly being happy. You deserve to be happy. Enjoy the day.

The person you are is the very Essence of your Being. This Being might be called your soul, your higher self, or your authentic self. The label isn't important, just the acknowledgement that you are more than the physical person reading these words right now. Unshakeable Self Confidence
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Written by Sherrie Vitello

Copyright(c)2011.Living An Unhappy Life - The Causes and Effects.Written by Sherrie Vitello.All Rights Reserved.

      
       

Beat The Negative Attitude With A Different Outlook

Negative: expressing opposition or denial; lacking any affirmative quality. Positive: certain, absolutely sure; decisive; direct. In comparison these two words are the opposite of each other. Just as human beings have opposite sides to their personalities. It all starts from childhood. How we are shown the world. How we react to situations. How we deal with pressures bought on by others. Since there is no manual on how to raise the perfect human, parents have had to rely on things they were taught and things they believe when teaching their children. Right on up until we're old enough to handle our daily lives. Now although we always hear of someone "going wrong" because of how they were raised, and how we're raised does effect how we form our character. Parents can only give advice or put their child on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. The outcome to any situation will rely on how we see the problem.

For instance, have you ever known someone who always blows things way out of proportion. Alot of the time it's due to stress for that person but also due to that person has not learned that the best way to solve things is to meet them calmly and not to allow anger to blure your vision of rationality. Things will always go wrong in all of our lives, for one reason or another. If we just take a deep breath, wait a few seconds before speaking, think about the situation before coming to a conclusion, we stand a better chance at handling it with a much better resolve. In my life I've met people along the way that would just fly off the handle, before they even knew the entire situation. I did my best to stay away from that negative source. It makes it very difficult for us to approach someone who will not hear the entire situation and they will only think of the negative. This is not the correct way to resolve a situation or problem.

How to Eliminate Stress and Anxiety from Your Life 
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When we look at situations or problems with a positive outlook or attitude we are able to resolve it easier and with less stress. A positive outlook gives us the opportunity to explore the different ways of solving things because we're not angry, stressed(too much) or thinking everything is negative. Therefore we can beat the negative attitude with a different outlook. And 9 times out of 10 we're going to succeed at making a decision for whatever situation may arise, for the better. So the next time you come across something that boils your blood, makes you mad, take a few moments to think about what would be the best way to resolve this, in a positive way, so it turns out well for all concerned. Leave your anger somewhere else because it will most likely get you no where. I guess for alot of us maturity plays an important role in learning to achieve a positive way of thinking. We would be better for it, emotionally and health wise once we realize that negative begats negative. Just as positive begats positive. Keep calm and carry on. Enjoy the day.
How to Eliminate Stress and Anxiety from Your Life 
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Written by: Sherrie Vitello

Weightloss?...This is a Lifestyle Change.

I was watching one of those tv-infomercials the other morning about exercising to lose weight. I couldn't help notice how hard the narrator was trying to get the point across of how much weight you could lose. They would show a woman that was about 5'4", 200lbs. and after just 3 months of using this certain exercise video, she lost 65lbs. Really??... For anyone of us out there trying to lose weight, (who isn't?), please don't stress out over the bs these informercials try to shove down our throats.  Just 3 months huh? 

It'll take most of us 3 months just to get the routine down, let alone doing the routine as coordinated and as fast as they show in the informercial. Believe me I know, I've tried. Plus...why is it that they only show young people?  I mean don't things start heading south after age 40?...Geez!  Ok I'm getting off my point here. Back to the point I'm trying to make. I know in this world everyone is trying to make money using those not too realistic infomercials and advertising. But come on, surely you know that most of those products don't do half of what they state. Plus some of those products are too expensive.

So what can we do to lose the weight and not lose our minds in the process?  For one, with the availability of computers and technology, we have access to all sorts of information. Thats the one thing we should take advantage of here. Taking a few minutes to obtain information about the things that can help us achieve what we are setting out to achieve. If you can afford to go to a dietician, then go get accessed and work out an eating plan that works for you. On the way home, DO NOT stop by the local store for any snacks. One thing I've learned in my journey of losing this middle-aged alien fat is we have to work on what works for us.

If you just listen to all these exercise guru's that tell you 10 different things, you will surely get discouraged. Although we all have the same body parts, inside our bodies can be very different from each other. Due to our bodies make up and our emotional state of mind. Metabolsm, heredity, ability to burn fat, motivation, attitude etc. It's not like you can go on a diet, exercise for a few months when you're feeling up to it and achieve the body shape you're looking for. You have to realize that this is a lifestyle change NOT a short journey.   

You can't do a lifestyle change for a few months. It's exactly what it says it is..."life style."  Look at what you're eating. Ask yourself, do I eat too much fried foods?  Am I stopping by too many fast food restaurants for a quick lunch? Do you tell yourself, "I don't have the time to make a healthy lunch."  Really??... Well ask yourself this, "How much do I care about my health now, in 10, 20, or 30 years from now?"  Are you one of those people that say, "Awww, I'll worry about 10, 20, or 30 years from now when I get there." Well guess what?  Everything you do for your bodies health now...will benefit you greatly in those 10 to 30 years from now.

That's right. If you change to eating healthy, learn about those foods that burn fat, increases the metabolism, foods that help prevent deseases, don't eat fried foods, eat brightly colored veggies and fruits, stop eating at those fast food restaurants, you won't only add years to your life span, you'll add healthy years.  Of course this is not an easy task. So start with changing how you see yourself. Learn to love and respect yourself. When I look at myself in the mirror, which I'm not particularly fond of doing, I see that I need to keep working at my body. I know I have a few more pounds to lose, I'm not bathing suit ready.

But the difference is my attitude about myself has changed.  I no longer look away in discouragement or disgust. I look and see some improvement, some weight loss and I smile. I tell myself I'm doing good, I'm feeling better about me, and thats what I hold on to, that keeps me motivated. Oh and if I were you, get into the habit of not using the bathroom scale. As you get into exercising regularly you'll start to build muscle and muscle weighs more than fat, so if you step on the scale and you've gained instead of lost weight but you've been working your food program and exercising regularly, don't despair. 

As your routine gets more involved and your body starts to respond to your new lifestyle, you'll see the changes in your body, it won't happen overnight, but it does come. Without a doubt, your body will change and you will lose that excess weight.  But remember, be fair to yourself, don't have unrealistic expectations about how long a period of time it will take. Experience shows when we commit to ourselves and we are determined to achieve what we have set out to do, things have a way of working in our favor. So what ever you do, don't stop. It's when things seem their toughest that we must not give up.  Enjoy the day!

Written by: Sherrie Vitello

Reflections for the New Year.

Well it's the New Year, 2011.  We all have to get use to writing the correct year now....like every new year.  So looking back on 2010, how was it for you?  Do you think it was a good year?  Did you accomplish things you've planned to do?  Were you able to achieve all of last years new years resolutions?  Well if you're like me, you accomplished some but not all of them.  But don't fret...there's always this new year.

We have to let go of the negative things or events that took place last year. Don't let the past remind us of what we are not now.  If there are things that helped us to make changes for the better, then carry them over into the new year. If there are things that we can improve on even better, then let's try to do that this year.  Make up your mind to be a better person.  To improve on things that were good last year but always have room for improvement. Whatever you feel can help you to exist in a positive light about yourself, your life, your situation, just do it!

Each day a new beginning.

This next excerpt is taken from the wonderful book: Each Day A New Beginning, by Karen Casey.  Acceptance of our past, acceptance of the conditions presently in our lives that we cannot change, brings relief. It brings the peacefulness we so often, so frantically seek.  We can put the past behind us. Each day a new beginning.  And each day of abstinence offers us the chance to look ahead with hope.

A power greater than ourselves helped us to find this program. That power is ever with us. When we fear facing new situations, or when familiar situations turn sour, we can look to that power for help in saying what needs to be said and for doing what needs to be done. Our higher power is as close as our breath. Conscious awareness of it's presence strengthens us, moment by moment.

Enjoy your new year to come, enjoy your life, enjoy your day.
Written by Sherrie Vitello

Don't Compromise Yourself...You Are All You Got!

When we don't know who we are, it's easy to compromise ourselves. When we don't know where we stand on an issue, it's easy to be swayed by a forceful voice. Values may be cloudy in our minds, or we may not be aware of them at all. It's then that we are vulnerable to the persuasion of another.

We are supported in our efforts, and we realize we have friends who don't want us to compromise ourselves-who value our struggle to know and to be true to ourselves. One of lives greatest gifts is discovering we can make decisions that represent us, our inner selves, and those decisions please us.

We all are familiar with the tiny tug of shame that locates itself in our solar plexus. When we "go along" when we give in on a personally important issue, we pay a consequence. We lose a bit of ourselves. Over the years we've lost many bits.  However...we always have a choice.

What can be done about those "low-times."

We all have those days when we feel a "low time", things aren't flowing as well as we'd like them to. Not so much depression, just a "not so up feeling." Our positive thoughts and ideas have taken a back seat to feeling low and unmotivated. Don't despair...this does happen to all of us at some point or another. It could be due to things happening in the world around us or a sad time in our lives, due to the loss of someone we love or something that meant alot to us. Or just the daily grind of trying to make a living. Usually this "low time" is short lived. But if you're having trouble getting over something like this, no doubt, reach out to someone for help or get professional counseling. Don't be apprehensive about applying what is available to us in our time of need. We are not robots, we are feeling, emotional, caring human beings, at least most of us are, so reaching out for some support is not a bad thing. It could help you save your sobriety and get you back on track.

You can also give it a few days and see how you're feeling. For women, I would suggest this especially because we have hormone swings every month and they can play a serious role in messing with our emotions. You may even need the assistance of a medical professional to help with those hormone swings.

I have found that a healthy diet, exercise, and a positive outlook no matter what, can do just as well, if not better than medications. But check with your doctor, if you can afford to, just to be sure. If you can't afford a doctor, and with the cost of living today it's hard to keep regular check ups with a doctor, unless you can afford it. It won't hurt you to change your diet for a healthy one, exercising everyday for at least 20-40 minutes, allowing yourself to break a good sweat, and practicing some form of meditation a couple times a week, like, yoga or tai-chi. Dedicate yourself to this faithfully and I assure you, you will feel better and see a positive difference in how you look at things. Written by Sherrie Vitello 

But remember this: It isn't for the moment you are struck that you need courage, but for the long uphill climb back to sanity and faith and security.  By Anne Morrow Lindbergh

"I may run into some rocks or even a boulder today. I have stepped around them in the past. I will do so again."   Excerpt taken from the wonderful book: Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey.

Enjoy the day!

Sometimes what we need is right in front of us.

  Today I woke up feeling rather down, I hated the idea that I might be slipping back into my state of depression, which I thought I had lost along time ago. I was affraid it had reared it's ugly head, and that I would feel like I use to when I thought nothing really mattered. I held my face in my hands and began to pray. I didn't want to go back to feeling that way. It terrified me to think that it could happen. I stopped myself from thinking negative and I thought; "Ok, what can I do that will make me feel better?" I knew I had to do my morning routine of exercising even tho' at that moment I really didn't feel like it.

I knew I had to be positive for my spouse, so he could go off to work feeling good about things at home. I dare not show him my worry. Not now! It's not that I can't talk to him about things like this, it's just that I knew if I started to tell him how bad I was feeling, it would bring him down too. He's always such a happy morning person. I love that about him. No...I was going to fight this off. I am determined to find a way to channel these negative feelings. So I got up and began my morning routine. After I was alone, I was still feeling down. I thought; "Ok...I'll get my day started."

I put on my workout clothes and began my morning exercise routine. I realized my heart wasn't into it. I made myself channel those negative feelings into my workout. I would breath-in a state of positive, relaxed emotion and breath out the negative, worried feelings. I really worked hard at focusing on that technique. Alittle more than 1/2 way through my workout I was surprised to notice that I began to feel better. I was actually feeling better...Yaaaay! I was really glad about that. I know when we exercise it causes our brain to release endorphines, the feel good hormones, and I think that's wonderful!

It's a good thing to get into an exercise routine. Not only will it help to keep us healthy but it truly is good for our mind and emotions. Now don't get me wrong, I didn't just start exercising yesterday, it's been about 8 months. The difference is this is one of the those times I actually was able to use my exercise routine to help remove negative feelings and create a more positive state of mind. I always felt good after I would exercise but this time it was different. It was actually like a cure for what was ailing me. If you just do stretching and flexibility exercises, yoga, pillates, or a higher impact exercise routine...

...once you get started I believe anyone will reap the benefits of this. It will make you feel grateful. I got started because I was putting on weight and I wasn't comfortable in my skin any longer. I needed a change, so I began to make changes in my diet and I began an exercise routine. I still have a ways to go until I'm satisfied with myself, but I know now that this is the way to go. Here I've been looking for ways to improve my life, myself, my outlook and it was right here in front of me all along. I guess what I'm trying to say is "sometimes we need something to help us and we don't realize that it's right in front of us." Amazing!  

                                                     Enjoy the day!

Angel or Devil on my Shoulder...?

Sometimes I really wonder if I had an Angel or a Devil on my shoulders'.  How many of you have felt that way or asked yourselves the same question?  When a person is addicted to drugs or alcohol (or both), it seems like there IS an Angel and  a Devil on there shoulders'.  I think back to my own experiences I went through when I was addicted to drugs and alcohol and the struggle I went through knowing what I was doing to myself, and my loved ones.

Although it's been over 5 years that I've lived a clean and sober life, I sure am glad I had that Angel. At those times of my "downside of life" I can remember doing things that I would have never done on a clean/sober mind.

I cringe when I think of the stupid, senseless, things I did that could have got me in alot of trouble, and I cry when I think of the times I stole money from my loved ones. I can't believe I gave into temptation so easily, I can't believe I did those things.

I know in recovery we're not suppose to think we'll never be that way again......but I have to tell you, it'll be a cold day in hell before I go back to being an addict.  I mean that with all of my heart and strength.  I'm sure some of you out there feel the same way and have had the same type of experiences. Or maybe you're still going through those experiences because you're just not ready to stop the craziness of being an addict.

You might even think you can't exist without your drug of choice or drink of choice.  Well, until you get sick of being sick and tired of your life just not working for you, you'll have that Devil on your shoulder until you change. There will always be a struggle between good and bad.  When you first start out to change your life to a clean/sober life, it's hard, I 'm not going to sugar-coat it, but with support, you can become stronger towards the cravings, you can learn to turn away from the triggers and that Angel...just gets stronger and stronger.

Some folks out there can never turn away from there addictions because they have led that way of life for so long....without professional and medical help, they probably wouldn't last too long on the clean/sober side of life. But even they can change their lives. The power of the mind can be a very formidable component to changing ones life. 

We all know that somethings in life are just too much to bare sometimes and we actually convince ourselves that there is no way out. But to all of you just starting to get clean, remember, you've already taken the first big step in improving your way of life. Just put one foot in front of the other and keep heading in 'THAT' same direction.

You'll see, you'll get to the point where you'll look back on your life and you'll wonder...."wow, was I really like that..?"  Let that be the motivation you need to stay clean and sober.  It does get better. Time does heal. We can become stronger in our convictions to live a clean and sober life, we can be happy.

Enjoy the Day.

To all my visitor's please take into consideration that the Angel and Devil description used in this post is used as a metaphor to describe the struggle of becoming clean and sober.

 

Trying to Control Things can Make Things Worse....

Most of us have struggled, willfully, with untold numbers of addictions, liquor, uppers, downers, sugar, chocolate, cigarettes, the opposite sex. The more we become determined to control our use or to abstain, the greater the compulsion felt for one drink, one bite, one puff. Giving in completely was the turning point.
Recovery helps each of us find relief from our primary addiction once we humble ourselves, accept our powerlessness, and ask for help. It can help us equally effectively, every day, with any problem we are willfully trying to control. Is a family member causing grief? Is a coworker creating anxiety? Has a close friend pulled away? We expend so much energy trying to manage outcomes! 

In most cases, our attempt to control will invite even more resistance. Recovery offers the way out of any frustrating situation. We can be mindful of our powerlessness and cherish the opportunities offered by our higher power. We can turn over whatever our problem is to God and quietly, trustingly, anticipate the resolution. It's guaranteed. Have faith in yourself, believe in the power of prayer. We're not only talking to God when we pray, we are talking to ourselves.

If you were to look into a mirror at yourself and say, "I feel good about myself today"...chances are you'll feel good throughout the day. You'll have the same effect negatively if you were to say something negative about yourself.  One good rule of thumb I did when I was changing my outlook about myself is, I would make sure that everyday I would say something nice to someone. Not only did it help that person feel good, it made me feel good as well. Try being more positive about yourself. You're on a journey here and you want it to turn out well.  Enjoy the day.
My writings here have been combined with Karen Casey's Book: Each Day a New Beginning.

The One Thing.....

Something that I learned about making changes for the better was, I had to gain a positive attitude about my life and about myself. Believe me it wasn't as easy as it sounds. I felt as though I had the weight of the world on my shoulders...and in a way I did.  I was a single parent for a long time and I had to be the one that paid the bills and brought home the food.  I know that was the reason I never actually went off the deep end.
You'd think that would have been enough to stop myself, but it wasn't.
Even though I still had an addiction, of one kind or another,  I was able to function and keep up on the bills.

Of course I can't take all the credit here...with the help I received from human resources a couple of times and my family off and on, although it was still a struggle, I was able to get over some of those huge humps, and for that I was grateful.                     

But that didn't stop me from abusing myself every now and then. Back then I could handle it, so I thought. I was blinded by my indulgences that I didn't realize that the road I was headed down would only end in disaster if I didn't stop. So what could I do to change the way I saw myself into someone who loved oneself enough so that I could live a clean life?  As I've gotten wiser, I've realized that a person has to have something in their lives that matters.  Now don't get me wrong here...my daughters' mean the world to me and I believe they were my strength. But what I'm talking about by having something that matters is having something that appeals to my inner source or attitude.

For some folks it's religion, or a spiritual event, a love for something outside of your normal life.  All the good things that we have are great!...but we all need something that makes each one of us feel content, competent, whole and grateful. I believe that that can be as different to each of us as we are individual. So the 'one thing' then is for all of us who turn towards artificial stimuli, and over do it, and become addicted to it, need to seek out what it is in ourselves that makes us feel whole. Stop the insanity!!(thank you Susan Powder) Drop the baggage that weigh's us all down and weakens our spirit. We've all had some bad things happen to us along the way. Sadly some never come out of it, but when you have the right information and we learn to let go of the things that weigh us down, we can emerge into a better life, be clean and be happy.  Although we some

times feels as though we have no control....the 'one thing' is....up to you.
[Written by Sherrie Vitello]

Self Pity (the parasite)

Self-pity is a parasite that feeds on itself.  Many of us are inclined towards self-pity, not allowing for the balance of life's natural tragedies.  We will face good and bad times--and they will pass.  With certainty they will pass.  The attitude "Why me?" hints at the little compassion we generally feel for others' suffering.  Our empathy with others' even our awareness of their suffering, is generally minimal.  We are much too involved in our own.  Were we less self-centered, we'd see that blessings and tragedies visit us all in equal amounts. 

                                                          
Some people respond to their blessings with equanimity, and they quietly remove the sting from their tragedies.  We can learn to do both.  Recovery is learning new responses, feeling and behaving in healthier ways.  We need not get caught by self-pity.  We can always feel it coming on. And we can always let it go.  Self-pity may beckon today, fortunately, we can learn that we have other choices.
Taken from the wonderful book: Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

A Moment of Inspirational Poetry.....

                  

Shadow  of  my    Pen

Shadow of my pen
caught my tired eye
Writing without reason
Follows my desire
Walk along beside me
Tip by tip we blend
Feeling all the rhythm
Flowing through my hand

All the letters bouncing
A bigger life than I
As my pen it dances
Where I choose to fly
Will I share my passion?
To keep my dream alive
Or will I let it slip?
Without the will to try

Stumbled down I have
Lied there reaching out
For anything to help me
Understand what life's about
Now I see this purpose
It has brought me to my knees
But this never ending circus
Keeps me in displease

Still I keep on writing
Through my sense of doubt
Just so I can show you
What I think life's about.

Taken from the book:  Through This Addicts Eyes
By:  Celeste Vitello
 http://stores.lulu.com/dare2bdeep

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Low self esteem is definitely a solvable problem.......
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You are going to have to take some effective action....that's the bottom line!
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Why we are here.......

We've developed this blog to help visitors' find ways to cope with changes in their lives and find new strength as they look for ways to improve their own ways of thinking, attitudes, addictions and self image.  Sometimes in our lives we need to make changes for the better, and we don't always have the assistance outside of our selves to make those changes.  Contained within this blog is several self help items and words to encourage 
us which can be of great help to anyone who needs that extra boost to get going with change and stay on track.

Of course listening and speaking to others' with the same problems and some guidance can be of help as well.  It's always good to relate with others that share a common ground.  But sometimes we'll find ourselves having to deal with our issues on our own.  So what if you had a blog where you could go and find
some information about how you're feeling about things, what you can do about things that may be bothering you or you may want to find out how to deal or handle a situation that's getting in the way of you being at your best. 

That's why we're here.  We share several insights, advice, suggestions, great reads, all intended to help visitors' maybe find some answers.  We always invite comments too, your points of views are an important part of what we do too.  So please, after you've looked us over,  we encourage you to leave us any comments or questions. 

Now for the sake of not misleading anyone, please understand, we are not  psychologists' and we don't make claims to being one.  Everything within this blog is written purely from experiences we've been through, experiences that loved ones and friends have been through, and alot of research about human emotions.  It's wisdom learned from alot of situations we've seen others in and been in ourselves. 
The reason we feel the need to write about this is because we've learned alot of good things that we believe can help others that are searching for answers or information to help them find there way.  That's why we love to read from visitors' that like to share too....we can all get something out of each others insights and ideas.  So by all means don't hesitate to write what you're thinking about....lets get this conversation going!
[Written by Sherrie Vitello]