How Do I Reach Out For Help - What About Support Groups?

Someone has stated that they don't quite understand this sobriety thing, how to reach out or get connected. A lot of people feel that way when first changing their lives for the better. When you've realized that you need to change you've just done what you question. You have already begun reaching out. At this point, getting involved in a home group is very beneficial to you. You can find a variety of information online. GO! You'll see. Be sure to ask where you can get a schedule-book with all the locations and time-schedules in it. Don't feel bad about going to meetings, everyone there has the same goal, more than less. Even though at first we all may feel awkward at an unfamiliar place. Stick with a place for a few visits and get a feel for the group. If you're not comfortable with a place go to another place. Until you feel comfortable about going there all of the time. Its a process, so take your time. But GO! At first it may seem like its useless but it isn't. Then again you may find a place right off that you'll feel really good about. You may also want to check out the selected groups for men or women only. The first step is recognizing that you have to change, so you are already on your way to changing for the better. Now you need to learn the tools of how to deal with keeping to it. Remember how far you would go to get your DOC? (works for Drink or Drug of choice.) Use that same persistence and desire to get the support & learn the tools you need to stick to your sobriety.
Its ALL worth it.  

 

This is one journey that is more successful when you have support from others. Because addiction is very stubborn about staying in your life. It will cause you to have cravings and triggers influenced by the social structure you are subjected to everyday. Its a monkey on your back and its holding on to you very strongly. You'll need to learn how not to give in to it. Because of all the influence there is in society for most of us it can be difficult to overcome, at first. But by having support and direction from your group, you will become strong enough to overcome those influences that would otherwise get the better of you. If you are fortunate enough to connect  with  a "good" sponsor, its a very good idea to do so. You may have to go through a couple of sponsor's though before you find one that really is active in helping you stay clean and sober. But don't despair, you will find one. Although some people may not be as genuine as others, you can connect with the right person. Don't give up trying. A sponser can become an important associate in your journey to staying clean and sober. Look for someone who has been clean and sober for more than 2 years. In doing so, this person has honed the tools for staying away from the addiction. You want someone who has a positive outlook and solid emotional stability. So look for these qualities before you ask someone to be your sponsor.

 

 

What about relationships? One rule of thumb you should always stick to during recovery and that is, NEVER get romantically involved with your sponsor, people in your group, or even people outside of your group. Especially within your first year of going to meetings. Why is this important? Because when you're in the first stages of recovery you are not emotionally ready or prepared to take on any issues that come with a relationship. Just the common events of it can be stressing. A lot of times when things get stressed or go wrong in a relationship, it can cause you to relapse. Sometimes it can cause worse things to happen as well. Its safer for your sobriety and for you to keep any outside emotional demands from occurring. If you're already in a relationship, hopefully your partner is attending meetings as well. Either for themselves or to learn how to support the partner in recovery. Both people in a relationship will need to learn how to deal with sobriety whether both are addicts or not. Also remember just because you are going to a meeting place where most people are working at the same thing, sobriety, don't think that everyone there is a wonderful, trust worthy, supportive person. Even though we'd like to think that about everyone, there will be some people there with their own agenda. They may not be as genuine about their sobriety as others. Something else to keep in mind.

 

                            

All in all attending a support group for any addiction is a very useful tool for people. You get from it what you want by attending. Take the time to talk to someone who has been going to meetings for a long time. Someone who has been clean and sober for a while. You can feel their inner-strength, self assurance and positive attitude. It doesn't matter how many people are at a meeting either. You can attend a small group or a large group, its up to you. But going is key to feeling better and staying clean and sober. You are going because you want to learn to live life on life's terms, without having to use drugs or alcohol to exist. The cravings diminish overtime, the triggers are kept at bay because you've learned how to deal with them. You wake up and actually feel grateful for the day. Like a lot of things, you get out of it what you put into it. But you have to make up your mind to go everyday even more than once a day if necessary. This is your journey to sobriety. You are going to these meetings to help yourself get on the road of a clean, sober and happy life. This is the most important thing you can do for yourself and your life. You have to take it serious in order for your recovery to be achieved. And it can be achieved even if you're at that point of your addiction where you believe you can't exist without your DOC. As a matter of fact its when you think that.. that its time to get the help you need. Its time to get your life back. Just Go!

 

 

 

Copyright(c)2013.How Do I Reach Out For Help - What About Support Groups? Written by SherrieVitello. All Rights Reserved.

Failure Should not be Looked Upon as a Negative.

"The way we perceive things will be the compass to how happy or how miserable we will feel."

"..its going to be a positive day.."

I've always believed that with each new day we all have the opportunity to make that new day a positive, productive, happy day. We owe to ourselves to try and have a good day. One that will end with a feeling of gratitude or satisfaction that we did the best that we could with the hours of the day we had. I've learned to think a certain way as soon as I become awake every morning. After all..in order to change our lives we have to change our thinking. For the better of course. So every morning before I even get out of bed, I immediately think to myself "..I will have a positive and productive day.." Its a form of self talk that I've grown accustomed to doing. Best of all it works well when we're at a stage of our lives of uncertaintly or unclarity. For things to be better in our lives, so we don't feel bad or sad every time we start a new day, we have to see our reality for what it truly is for each of us individually. Even when things arise that we feel we have no control over. The way we deal with it will make all the difference in how we feel. If things don't seem to be working out for us then its time to re-evaluate the way we are living. We should do this in order to find out where we should begin to make changes so we can carry on with a better outlook about our lives.

"..don't throw in the towel!.."

If we keep blaming everything on situations or circumstances then what we are really saying to ourselves is that we have no control over our thinking or lives. We've gotten to a point where we either "think" we can't change or we don't "want" to make the effort to change. That kind of mindset can and usually does lead to negative feelings, thoughts and outcomes. I've also learned that failure should not be looked upon as a negative. Why? Because if we didn't fail then how would we know what or where to change things for the better? We wouldn't. We would just keep going along the way we're going. Thinking that nothing will ever be better or different for us in our lives. So the next time you fail at something, instead of throwing in the towel, try to look at that failure from a different perspective. Think to yourself.."what can I do to make the outcome be more positive or successful?" Look back at the situation that caused you to fail in the first place, see it for what it is and try going about whatever it was you were trying to accomplish, from a different angle. It might surprise you to find that by looking at your situation from a different perspective was just what you needed to make the task (or situation)positive and successful.

Money as a Tool is Essential.

Failure is only fatal when we deem it so. The way we perceive things and what we do about things that come about in our daily lives will be the compass to how happy or how miserable we will feel. Alot of people allow material things to be the base of their happiness. Especially money. No doubt money (when used as a tool) helps us to have the essentials for living i.e. food, our electric bill, house payment, our car payment, our insurance, clothes etc. What I find is that even though people usually have enough money to pay for these essentials, (or they have assistance) people always want or need more. Thats because money has become the most important factor for alot of people. There's nothing wrong with having the desire to make more money in order to live better. But when it comes to being so preoccupied with making money that you forget the true quality of living, that is a problem. We malfunction. Like a robot that is overloaded with too much to process. We can forget about the important things in life i.e. our families, helping others, the beauty of nature, the small things we do that really count and gives us feelings of gratitude or fullfilment. All in all in our pursuit of happiness we should never forget the things that matter. No matter how small they may be. In keeping to this way of thinking, we can be more balanced in all the phases of our lives.

"Don't Allow Your Failures To Hold You Down"

Everyone at one time or another will fail at something. Its just the way the cycle of living is. What we have to realize about failure is that we can learn from it and actually use it as a tool to make things turn out better for each of us. Learning this lesson early on in life is essential to creating a productive, successful path for our lives. Unfortunately some people won't learn this until they are older and have been through some negative experiences. We try to cushion the stress or hurt we may have experienced by buffering the emotional pain with drugs, alcohol or other forms of addiction. Which because we are creatures of habit, usually turns into an addiction. Although this is a difficult stage for people to go through, they can still come out of it, be free of it and not rely on artificial stimuli to help them cope. Besides, people miss so much when in the haze of addiction. I never knew how much I truly missed until I became free of my addictions. It was as if I was standing on a mountain cliff and I saw the sunrise for the first time. I mean to genuinely have laughter because I honestly felt happy was an awakening I'll never let go of. So if you're feeling down about the way you see your life and you're not sure of what to do to improve your life. Try looking at things differently from a different perspective. Sometimes a small change in how you think can make a huge difference. Enjoy the day.


Copyright(c)2012.Failure Should not be Looked Upon as a Negative.Written by Sherrie Vitello.All Rights Reserved.